5 Ways To Know If Tantra Is Right For You!

Several years ago I had the pleasure of interviewing Yoga expert, Satya Kalra on my Podcast, “Sex Is Medicine with Devi Ward”. (You can tune in using the links at the bottom of this post!)

We spoke about why and how Yoga can improve your relationships, and of course, your sex life.

A major point that arose several times throughout our conversation was that the  practice of “Yoga” consists of much more than just the physical positions and exercises (called asanas).

True Yoga is in fact a way of life.

Interestingly Tibetan Tantric Buddhism considers “Tantra” to be the highest form of Yoga.

According to this tradition the word Tantra literally means “to weave light and sound with form”.

Traditional Tantric practices are first done non-sexually (to establish a foundation of presence, awareness and focus), and then later applied to sexual activity for the purpose of using that energy for quantum healing, rapid transformation, and evolutionary personal growth.

As my path has continued to progress, the aspect that stands out for me most definitively about the practice of Tantra is the concept of “weaving”.

For me the beauty of true Tantra is that the daily exercises (or yogas) serve to integrate every area of our life, so that all aspects- physical, emotional, mental, spiritual, and sexual, are functioning in harmony and balance.

There is no part of our lives, or aspect of ourselves, which is separate from the whole. No aspect of ourselves which we are denying, or pushing aside out of fear, or guilt, or shame.

It is about embracing everything; the good, the bad, and the ugly.

Examining every shadow and dark corner, understanding the root and core of our suffering, and bringing it into the calm sweet voidness of our soul’s center. Eventually revealing that inner place of utter peace, stillness, and uncompromising self-love and acceptance.

Ultimately, Tantra is the path of union.

Union in ALL things. Union in our thought, speech, action, dreams, and desires.

Union of our universal selves with the fragmented, disenfranchised parts we decided not to love.

Union with the voices in our head, keeping us in fear and pain, and running us ragged everyday with conflicting needs and desires.

Union with our body, and understanding the messages it tries to convey with very ache, pain, bruise and bulge.

And union with our true, infinite, unblemished nature- that part of us which is constant, never changing, and will continue to exist long after this body dies, and this egoic self is no more.

So all that being said,  how do you know if Tantras is the right “path” for you?

Here are 5 sign posts that say you are ready:

#1. You are on a path of personal growth and you seem to have hit a “glass ceiling”, meaning- you are doing your practice regularly, but you’re not seeing much result, and/or, you still feel something is missing.

#2. You yearn for MORE! Not sure what more looks like yet, but there is a subtle but persistent ache inside, or anxiety which can’t be quelled. You are constantly searching for something, but nothing seems to fill the void.

#3. You crave tangible tools to understand the core of your being. All this talk about love on the inside is great, but you want to know HOW. You want a clear, direct, tangible formula for having inner peace, self-connection, self-confidence, self-love, and PLEASURE!

#4. You want to bust open and live life out loud! You feel you are on the verge of something, and you want a push to the next level. You are looking for the missing piece of the puzzle, the thing that will bust you wide open so that you can live life with full confidence, fearlessness, and self empowerment.

#5. You want to heal. You know you have emotional/physical pain in your body relating to sexual experiences throughout your life. Maybe you were sexually abused. Maybe you feel pain during sex. Maybe you feel crushing guilt and shame around masturbation. Whatever it is- pain; be it emotional or physical, is a symptom of trauma. Trauma keeps us locked into a limiting pattern. Healing trauma frees us to experience life as it is NOW, without continuously reacting to an experience in our past.

The key to “fulfillment” in life is essentially an inside job, so no matter what we are seeking- healing, transformation, spiritual growth- it all starts on the inside, and blossoms outward.

The trick is finding the right tools to take you directly to the source.

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